The Cupcake Muskateers Tavern welcomes You
- Thread starter Tscheuss
- Start date
doomboy
Well-known member
hey ho
cdbd3rd
Well-known member
Had a bunch of old addresses for some folks. I never really send xmas cards, but had these fancy new D&D stamps to use this year.
Sadly, I got back more cards than made it to their destinations. Most of those were from folks who have been gone from game for ages.
So anyway, here's hoping for decent holidays for the regulars, the lurkers, and those many who have moved on.
(Condolensces DB. That nasty w*** bug will pass in time.
)
Sadly, I got back more cards than made it to their destinations. Most of those were from folks who have been gone from game for ages.
So anyway, here's hoping for decent holidays for the regulars, the lurkers, and those many who have moved on.
(Condolensces DB. That nasty w*** bug will pass in time.
)
doomboy
Well-known member
man.Had a bunch of old addresses for some folks. I never really send xmas cards, but had these fancy new D&D stamps to use this year.
Sadly, I got back more cards than made it to their destinations. Most of those were from folks who have been gone from game for ages.
So anyway, here's hoping for decent holidays for the regulars, the lurkers, and those many who have moved on.
(Condolensces DB. That nasty w*** bug will pass in time.
i feel ya.
cheers to y'all, and Happy Holidays
One way or another, y'all will always be with me
Bekki of Thunder Rift
Member
*Pokes head in
"Greetings All!"
Happy Holidays to All!
"Greetings All!"
Happy Holidays to All!
cdbd3rd
Well-known member
Speaking of people who's Xmas cards were returned...
-----------
Checked in with Cuppy with that maelstrom around Los Angeles - she has since moved out of California and is nowhere near them.
Last edited:
Lagin3
Well-known member
same to you.Speaking of people who's Xmas cards were returned...
-----------
Checked in with Cuppy with that maestrom around Los Angeles - she has since moved out of California and is nowhere near them.
doomboy
Well-known member
good to hear thatSpeaking of people who's Xmas cards were returned...
-----------
Checked in with Cuppy with that maestrom around Los Angeles - she has since moved out of California and is nowhere near them.
Sophie The Cat Burglar
Exotic Items Recovery Specialist
Sophia stood briefly before the entrance to The Cupcake Muskateers, looking up at the old, weathered sign, her expression somewhat pensive. After a long pause, she lowered her gaze to the door, walked forward, slowly opened the portal, and stepped inside. The intricate embroidery patterns on her long, elegant, black dress disappeared under the flickering lights of the tavern, her pale face and hands floating on a tall, willowy, feminine shadow. Her long, red blonde hair, held in a pony tail with a clasp of platinum, flowed like a river of molten gold dancing in the failing light.
A dwarf sitting at the table to Sophia's left, engaged in a card game with other regulars of the establishment, shifted his weight to one side, let rip a long and violent expulsion of sulfurous gas, then returned to level, taking a long pull from the contents of his tankard.
Sophia closed her eyes for a moment, steeled herself, then opened her eyes, leveled her chin and continued into the room at a brisk pace. Seven men sat clustered at the most secluded corner of the bar, each watching the others, each trying to keep his back to a wall.
"You're in my spot, partner.", said one of the men in a low, growling voice.
"This is my spot.", said another in an even lower, more gruff voice.
"You boys should be movin along.", said a third in a voice even more low and more rough than the previous two.
Someone needs to invent a bar with more corners.
Sophia moved to the bar and sat directly in front of the bar tender. Before she could speak with him, a gruff looking man clad in well worn leather armor, perhaps in his 40s, with a few wisps of salt in his black hair, sauntered up and said in a deep voice, "I'd like to buy this little lady a drink."
Almost everyone in the bar laughed. The balck haired man turned to look about the room, suddenly unsure of himself, then looked back at Sophia. "What's so funny?"
The card playing dwarf near the door said in a somewhat higher but still deep and gruff voice, "You be speakin with Lady Sophia and thrice cursed Vexa, the meanest pair o black hearted wenches this side o the Restless Isles. Best be steppin away if yea know what be good for ya."
"Wait.", said another man with his back to the wall in a gruff and deep voice. "I thought she was Miss Sophia. When did she become a Lady? Did a king make her royalty or something?"
"You dolt.", said another man in a deep and gruff voice, sitting with his back to a different wall. "That be the Princess Sophia, daughter of the Black Queen of furthest Itchy Itchy Land."
Itchy Itchy Land! Forgot about that one.
"Nay, you sorry lot of no good adventurers.", said a one eyed man with a particularly gruff voice, also standing against a wall. "That be Queen Sophia and her cursed hand maid Vexa, travellers from the plane of shadow come to wreck vengence upon the insect people of Antis Moundia."
I am not a hand maid!
Would you cut it out. I'm thirsty.
A man sitting against a wall, his legs spread before him, obviously very drunk, mutters in a deep and gravely voice, "The truth is, she is Empress of the far off land of..." A long belch from somewhere else in the room drowned out the rest of the revelation.
A tall elf with long, silver and blonde hair said in a high bass voice that resonates through the room, "You are all pathetic. You call yourselves worldly adventurers? Veteran pirates of the twelve seas? You are babes in the cradle. How pathetic. A Goddess of lies and treachery lies before you. She longs to pierce every black heart in this room. And you want to buy her a drink? To bed her? What a joke. She is going to spill every drop of blood in your useless veins, stand upon your heaped corpses, and laugh as your useless existances come to an end.
Whoa! Anime super villian spotted!
The man who offered the drink took a step back, his face now concerned, and said, "I'm not looking for any trouble, lady." He keeps his hands in the open as he takes another step back, then turned to leave.
Sophia turned her head to the left, just enough to look at the man out of the corner of her left eye. "What is your name?"
What are you doing?
"My name is Drake, maam."
"Thank you for your offer, Mister Drake, but I want to drink alone. Peace be with you, young man."
Peace be with you? Young man? What are you doing?
The man raised his hand and gave his hat a small tip towards Sophia. "Perhaps another time." He then turned away and left the tavern. The other men in the room follow his departure, jealosy burning in their eyes.
Sophia looked down at the bar top. "He is the kind of man who does his best to make the world better. He does not know anything about me." Her tone was sad. "Leave him alone."
The bartender, a tall half orc with a broken left tusk, asked in a deep, sonerous tone, "What will you be havin today, Miss Sophie?"
"Hank, I would like a strawberry smoothy with lots of vanilla ice cream and some cherries, please."
The half orc tilted his head and stopped cleaning the mug in his hands. "Hank?"
Oh fudge. Sophia looked up at the half orc, obviously embaressed. "Please pardon me. I meant, Karl."
"Not Karl."
"Rupert?"
"Nope."
Mortimer Fernswith Boonswallow!
Sophia suddenly exclaimed, "His name is not Mortimer Fernswith Boonswallow!" "Where did you even come up with that?"
"My name is not Mortimer any of that, Miss Sophia." The bartender was obviously amused and enjoying the situation.
"I am sorry.", said Sophia. "I cannot seem to remember your name."
"Kurlfist. We met twice before. I may not have offered you my name."
"It is a pleasure to meet you again, Kurlfist. I do not come here often."
"But when she does come here, she usually brings bile demons. Or monsters from the plane of madness. Or worse. Is that not so?" The elf who chastised the room earlier was now looking directly at Sophia, his expression arrogant and malicious.
Okay. What is anime super villian up to?
"Are you challenging me?" Sophia had turned her head to the other side, looking at the elf out of the corner of her right eye, her expression now serious. Who was this elf and what was he up to?
"Just a customer passing the time. I do not meet many Goddesses. They are such curious beings. Arrogant. Haunty. I do so enjoy the ones who deny what they are. So delcious." The elf was standing in the center of the room, completely at ease yet radiating malice.
"I have no idea what you are on about with this Goddess stuff, but whatever it is, not here." Sophia's voice was low and serious. Vexa, be ready to go.
The dwarf near the door looked at the elf and said, "You should be leavin the lady alone unless you be wantin a conversation with me axe."
"My hammer will be joining that conversation.", said one of the seven men at the corner of the bar.
"And my sword.", added another
"Oh my!", said the elf. "How chivalrous. They are all willing to fight for the monster in the room. How charming. This is so delicious. I wonder if they will still fight for you when they see what you really are. We should find out. It will be such a fun game."
"That's it. Cleavin time." The dwarf near the door slid out of his chair and brought up his axe, then began to cross the room towards the elf.
"This act is over. In the next, let's see how the Lady dances without that dress to hide what she really is." With that, the elf held up a crystal in his left hand. It blazed with a blood red light for a moment, then the elf disappeared with a gust of wind passing through the room.
"Elves talk too much.", grumbled the dwarf.
"Aye!", came a chorus of voices throughout the room.
Turning on her bar stoll to face the room, Sophia cast her eyes upon everyone present. "You should all be on your guard. That was a not a simple teleport. It was a planar dislocation. Whatever that was, it will be back, probably in a different form, and violent."
A tall man at the back of the room asked in a deep, stony voice, "Are you really a Goddess?" "Or any of those other things?"
Sophia looked at him and said, "I am whatever I need to be to get a decent fruit smoothy."
This story is dumb.
"I know."
A dwarf sitting at the table to Sophia's left, engaged in a card game with other regulars of the establishment, shifted his weight to one side, let rip a long and violent expulsion of sulfurous gas, then returned to level, taking a long pull from the contents of his tankard.
Sophia closed her eyes for a moment, steeled herself, then opened her eyes, leveled her chin and continued into the room at a brisk pace. Seven men sat clustered at the most secluded corner of the bar, each watching the others, each trying to keep his back to a wall.
"You're in my spot, partner.", said one of the men in a low, growling voice.
"This is my spot.", said another in an even lower, more gruff voice.
"You boys should be movin along.", said a third in a voice even more low and more rough than the previous two.
Someone needs to invent a bar with more corners.
Sophia moved to the bar and sat directly in front of the bar tender. Before she could speak with him, a gruff looking man clad in well worn leather armor, perhaps in his 40s, with a few wisps of salt in his black hair, sauntered up and said in a deep voice, "I'd like to buy this little lady a drink."
Almost everyone in the bar laughed. The balck haired man turned to look about the room, suddenly unsure of himself, then looked back at Sophia. "What's so funny?"
The card playing dwarf near the door said in a somewhat higher but still deep and gruff voice, "You be speakin with Lady Sophia and thrice cursed Vexa, the meanest pair o black hearted wenches this side o the Restless Isles. Best be steppin away if yea know what be good for ya."
"Wait.", said another man with his back to the wall in a gruff and deep voice. "I thought she was Miss Sophia. When did she become a Lady? Did a king make her royalty or something?"
"You dolt.", said another man in a deep and gruff voice, sitting with his back to a different wall. "That be the Princess Sophia, daughter of the Black Queen of furthest Itchy Itchy Land."
Itchy Itchy Land! Forgot about that one.
"Nay, you sorry lot of no good adventurers.", said a one eyed man with a particularly gruff voice, also standing against a wall. "That be Queen Sophia and her cursed hand maid Vexa, travellers from the plane of shadow come to wreck vengence upon the insect people of Antis Moundia."
I am not a hand maid!
Would you cut it out. I'm thirsty.
A man sitting against a wall, his legs spread before him, obviously very drunk, mutters in a deep and gravely voice, "The truth is, she is Empress of the far off land of..." A long belch from somewhere else in the room drowned out the rest of the revelation.
A tall elf with long, silver and blonde hair said in a high bass voice that resonates through the room, "You are all pathetic. You call yourselves worldly adventurers? Veteran pirates of the twelve seas? You are babes in the cradle. How pathetic. A Goddess of lies and treachery lies before you. She longs to pierce every black heart in this room. And you want to buy her a drink? To bed her? What a joke. She is going to spill every drop of blood in your useless veins, stand upon your heaped corpses, and laugh as your useless existances come to an end.
Whoa! Anime super villian spotted!
The man who offered the drink took a step back, his face now concerned, and said, "I'm not looking for any trouble, lady." He keeps his hands in the open as he takes another step back, then turned to leave.
Sophia turned her head to the left, just enough to look at the man out of the corner of her left eye. "What is your name?"
What are you doing?
"My name is Drake, maam."
"Thank you for your offer, Mister Drake, but I want to drink alone. Peace be with you, young man."
Peace be with you? Young man? What are you doing?
The man raised his hand and gave his hat a small tip towards Sophia. "Perhaps another time." He then turned away and left the tavern. The other men in the room follow his departure, jealosy burning in their eyes.
Sophia looked down at the bar top. "He is the kind of man who does his best to make the world better. He does not know anything about me." Her tone was sad. "Leave him alone."
The bartender, a tall half orc with a broken left tusk, asked in a deep, sonerous tone, "What will you be havin today, Miss Sophie?"
"Hank, I would like a strawberry smoothy with lots of vanilla ice cream and some cherries, please."
The half orc tilted his head and stopped cleaning the mug in his hands. "Hank?"
Oh fudge. Sophia looked up at the half orc, obviously embaressed. "Please pardon me. I meant, Karl."
"Not Karl."
"Rupert?"
"Nope."
Mortimer Fernswith Boonswallow!
Sophia suddenly exclaimed, "His name is not Mortimer Fernswith Boonswallow!" "Where did you even come up with that?"
"My name is not Mortimer any of that, Miss Sophia." The bartender was obviously amused and enjoying the situation.
"I am sorry.", said Sophia. "I cannot seem to remember your name."
"Kurlfist. We met twice before. I may not have offered you my name."
"It is a pleasure to meet you again, Kurlfist. I do not come here often."
"But when she does come here, she usually brings bile demons. Or monsters from the plane of madness. Or worse. Is that not so?" The elf who chastised the room earlier was now looking directly at Sophia, his expression arrogant and malicious.
Okay. What is anime super villian up to?
"Are you challenging me?" Sophia had turned her head to the other side, looking at the elf out of the corner of her right eye, her expression now serious. Who was this elf and what was he up to?
"Just a customer passing the time. I do not meet many Goddesses. They are such curious beings. Arrogant. Haunty. I do so enjoy the ones who deny what they are. So delcious." The elf was standing in the center of the room, completely at ease yet radiating malice.
"I have no idea what you are on about with this Goddess stuff, but whatever it is, not here." Sophia's voice was low and serious. Vexa, be ready to go.
The dwarf near the door looked at the elf and said, "You should be leavin the lady alone unless you be wantin a conversation with me axe."
"My hammer will be joining that conversation.", said one of the seven men at the corner of the bar.
"And my sword.", added another
"Oh my!", said the elf. "How chivalrous. They are all willing to fight for the monster in the room. How charming. This is so delicious. I wonder if they will still fight for you when they see what you really are. We should find out. It will be such a fun game."
"That's it. Cleavin time." The dwarf near the door slid out of his chair and brought up his axe, then began to cross the room towards the elf.
"This act is over. In the next, let's see how the Lady dances without that dress to hide what she really is." With that, the elf held up a crystal in his left hand. It blazed with a blood red light for a moment, then the elf disappeared with a gust of wind passing through the room.
"Elves talk too much.", grumbled the dwarf.
"Aye!", came a chorus of voices throughout the room.
Turning on her bar stoll to face the room, Sophia cast her eyes upon everyone present. "You should all be on your guard. That was a not a simple teleport. It was a planar dislocation. Whatever that was, it will be back, probably in a different form, and violent."
A tall man at the back of the room asked in a deep, stony voice, "Are you really a Goddess?" "Or any of those other things?"
Sophia looked at him and said, "I am whatever I need to be to get a decent fruit smoothy."
This story is dumb.
"I know."
doomboy
Well-known member
it has been several moons since we last saw someone of that name
