Notes for my therapist-entry 1

ENTRY-13

Your very welcome! For what you might ask? A couple of weeks ago I was tempted by plentiful ale and sturdy women to take a trip to a little known village a friend happened upon. When we got there we saw a sizable raiding party charging in so we ran them off. The townsfolk claimed that it was the third time that week and they would do anything to stop them. So, I sent my friend to tracking and boy did we find them. There were orcs, goblins, hobgoblins, bugbear and a few unholy offspring that were big, strong and had the littlest brainpan I'd ever seen. If it weren't for their faces they wouldn't need a head.
As we were making a plan we heard drums, horns and singing that only a mother could love and a dev could appreciate. We noticed it started getting dark, even though there wasn't a cloud in the sky, also the sun was leaving odd shapes in the shadows from the canopy of the trees, so plan or no plan I charged in and had to put an end to whatever ritual they were performing. I've never seen magic that strong before. I went from one side of the camp to the other several times chopping, hacking, slashing and if the fight got too thin, I just charged a group that was too scared to approach me, I can't say that I blame them. The fight went on for quite some time and I have to admit, it wasn't looking good. It kept getting darker, so I started singing a Dwarven war song about coming out from the mountains and into the light, appreciating the sparkle of steel as it reflected so bright, how inset gem twinkled in pommel and hilt and covered in crimson when all enemies were kilt. Lo and behold, the sun started fighting back as well, the forest grew brighter and I was running out of thing to slaughter. My friend said he mostly fired at the ones who ran, but I heard the wiz of an arrow and the hum of his bow to know that not all of his targets were fleeing. The fires were out and the forest was going to feast on intruders for a while, so we went back to the town.
A couple men went to see if our story checked out and came back looking different, like what they saw changed them, they confirmed everything and locked themselves in their houses, never saw them once during the 3 day festival. Some people asked them to come out but they never did. That town knows how to throw a real shin-dig, mugs that never emptied, platters of beef, ham, mutton, chicken and a few things I couldn't identify but tasted like chicken.
I think that in a few hundred years when my axes have dulled, my boots have worn through and my beard has lost all it's color, I might like to retire there. Maybe those raiders will come back by then and my old bones can have a little fun, or maybe I'll get eaten by a dragon next week. Let's roll the dice and see where fate takes me.
 
ENTRY-14

Sorry I've been gone a while, I found a new place to drink, laugh and get tossed in a cell. Who knew the city guard had a place where all of them go after work to blow off a little steam in normal clothes? Everyone there was complaining about the commoners, the people that are taxed to pay them to fix problems although some times it just seems like they only listen to the ones that throw them the most money, bought and paid for.

Back to my story, I tells them "Boo hoo, go cry at home!" and then a huge fight breaks out. Just like a few others of you, I have saved the known world and a few cities, great and small, more than a few times and after beating the day shift with nothing but closed fists, clamped tightly to a chair and for a short time a table leg, I have come to realize that they make furniture better for that place.

After a few months, they sent me to the magistrate and they fined me. Of course I had the money, paid the court and now I avoid that bar. I walked passed and a few guards still have broken noses pressed to one side of their face, lumpy bruised heads that look like they have an orc grandad in their family tree and limps, that furniture was really well made.

Until they need me, I have a rune strapped to my ankle so the city mages can track me. No one wants the job of following me around town after that last fellow woke up in a ships bilge half way across the ocean, I can spot them like a rogue. I guess I'll relax for a while, eat some good food and leave the head splitting for another day.
 
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